Metaphysical cameras

Me and the boss are well into our third week of what BL had termed "the goodbye tour". Throughout the past two months I've begun to develop a deeper appreciation for being present in the moment. There have been a lot of experiences that I had put into the box of "last time I'll ever do this". Upon further reflection, though, that phrase ought to be put into the same category as the "this is a once in a lifetime experience" or "I never ..." or "she always..." Realistically speaking these type of phrases are so extreme they end up being insignificant. For example my friend told me of this awesome conference he was going to go to and he described it as a once in a lifetime experience. But every experience is a once in a lifetime experience. There is never a single experience that we have that is exactly replicated. We ourselves are changing so there is never a time when our context is exactly the same; every experience is a once in a lifetime experience. :) I don't think this takes away from significant experiences but those experiences should be significant on their own merit, not significant because of their perceived rarity. As I go through my own list of last "once in a lifetime experiences" I have grown thankful for them. Even simple things like brushing my teeth, holding the hand of my boss, drinking a root beer, all these things, though seemingly ordinary, are extraordinary in their own right because they are what I am doing now. There's no denying that I am going to miss some things, but putting them in the category of "last time ever" makes me hold a little too long to them and creates, for me, a sense of hopelessness. We hang onto the now and the past because we cannot believe a future that is better than it. I look forward to the myriad of new experiences to see, hear, touch, taste, and feel. I look forward to enjoying the now in all it's joy and wonder, not looking behind or hanging on,realizing that the beauty of today's sunset is amazing but if it lasted forever, there'd be no way we'd ever get to tomorrow's sunset. In 2004 I got the opportunity to go to the Great Wall outside of Beijing. We didn't go to the touristy spot but instead went out to Simatai. It was amazing. The wall was more rundown here but it was so much more picturesque. Steps rose steeply against the mountainside with local peasants, their faces framed by years of sun and wind, chasing us to buy their postcards. I had my camera at the time and as I looked out I realized that no picture what would really do the experience justice. So I didn't take a picture. And since then, I've encountered many of those unKodak moments, moments so grand, beauty so overpowering it seemed almost blasphemous to try and capture them. I still love photography. I have a great appreciation for a well-framed shot that captures passion and emotion. But more and more I don't want to be an observer, I want to be a participant. So here's a top 10 list of things I enjoyed about our road trip, things I got to experience. Hopefully, none of these are last experiences. (In no particular order...) 1. Eating at the next to last Cracker Barrell. I think the first time I ate at Cracker Barrell was with Tank and his boss. It was the Lau Boss that first introduced me to the Cracker Barrell. I am in her debt. 2. Listening to all the episodes of This American Life that had been accumulating on our iTunes. Lots of heartbreak, lots of weirdness, and lots of hope. If you don't listen to This American Life, I suggest at least one listen. It's journalism at its finest. 3. Seeing a ton of windmills. 4. Stopping and eating at Murray Family Farms. The fruit was delicious. 5. Seeing Arizona desert. 6. Seeing a ton of stars as we drove through the Mojave desert at night. 7. Seeing the Colorado river. 8. Seeing the huge sky frame the grasslands of west Texas. 9. Trying to stop at Sonic around Happy Hour to get a cherry limeade. 10. I want to say being with the Boss... but that's cheesy. And it should be assumed! So I'll end with going to the beach in Santa Monica.